LEJOG2011: The Wrap Up

As we start the final leg of our journey from Blackpool back to London we thought we would try to capture some of the highlights and one or two lowlights of the trip (more for our own memory bank but hopefully it may also provide a reasonable read). 

As a very brief side note, yesterday's marathon drive south passed off well. We managed to load the support vehicle with the bike rack plus three bikes and completed the 470mile drive back to Thornton in around 9hrs. The enormity of the distance we have covered over the last 2 weeks started to hit home with every passing hour in the car. We were greeted with a finishing line tape as we crossed the threshold  into station road and Mum was there along with some old family friends to finish the tour off with a very enjoyable evening. 

Also, this wrap up couldn't pass without doffing our hats to the excellent support we received from Big Mike during the second week. His versatility and enterprise meant Big Mike's roadside tuck-shop/deli was always stocked with sweets and pasties, he could overcome any tyre blowout and we had the benefit of his wisdom with wines and whiskeys. We have included the top 3 Big Mike-isms in our summary below.

So to the summary. We are going to try to narrow down our two week marathon into the top three or four events under a number of categories:

Best cycling leg: Leg 8 (Thornton to Pooley) was impressive because of the beautiful scenery and the number of additional riders in the peloton; Leg 13 (Beauly to Altnaharra) due to the picturesque lochs, isolated pub at Crask and the single track A36; and Leg 5 (Bristol to Clun) due to our first border crossing over the Severn bridge, the idyllic meandering Wye valley and our first 90 plus day of cycling on tour.

Best stop (Dicky's parents was discounted as the touch of home comforts and a loving mother blew the commercial accommodation out of the water): Week Farm due to the warm welcome of Devon scones and clotted cream, great night in the White Hart and that John came and picked us up; Altnaharra Hotel as the quality food and array of whiskies was impressive; Clachaig Inn, Glencoe as we sampled our first truly Scottish dishes of Black Pudding, Haggis, Neeps n' Taties and Clottie dumplings and enjoyed the isolation of a log retreat; and Crawford Country House partially because we were saved from a rough night in Leadhills but mainly due to the luxury rooms, excellent breakfast and interesting night at the nearby truck stop.

Best pub: Riverside Inn, Clun as we were dead on our feet, had great cider and was located in a beautiful spot by a river; the Watermill at Ings as it was our last stop before the Kirkstone pass, where we devoured impressive lunches and were entertained by Paul with his hilarious sense of humour failure (see below); and the Crask Inn before Altanarra because of the remoteness of the pub and the imposing surroundings.

Richard Finn Best beers: Betty Stoggs from Cornwall, Butty Bach from Shropshire, the Lytham Blond from Lancashire (obviously) and Jennings Cocka Hoop from Cumbria. 

Big Mike Top whiskies: Laphoaig, Bowmore and Balvenie (footnote, credit does go to Phil who also recommended the Balvenie as well as the farmyard Bruichladdich, which unsurprisingly does make the top three).

Best sense of humour failure: Ian when crossing the Cornwall/Devon border after our multiple laps of Launceston; Dicky, his fall at end of first day after struggling up Watergate Hill and then being laughed at by Ace; and Ace because his mudguards were rubbing prior to the Kirkstone pass. We should also mention the dual sense of humour failure by Ian and Dicky after being told by Ace there were an extra 10 miles of riding to do up to Beauly.  It didn't make for a harmonious peleton for an hour or so. 

However, on looking back at the tour as a whole, the three musketeers stayed pretty tight and we are all still on speaking terms as we draw up to Euston. Sorry for those of you who we expecting fisticuffs and handbags at dawn! 

Best guest riders: 
- Fergs is in under worst guest rider due to many misdemeanours, including him causing the only multiple pileup, falling off twice, breaking his chain and providing the dodgy pump that caused Dicky's blowout. Quite an impact for his 24hrs on tour.  
- JB rode the most miles with the three of us, clocking just shy of 200 miles and using his family heritage to help us safely negotiate the tricky border crossing into Scotland. We did contemplate disqualifying JB due to the false promise of pancake flat plains and shimmering peat bogs of the far north.   
- Stuart 'Grandad' Carter takes the last spot due to the positive impact he had on leg 8 to Pooley Bridge. He calmly and expertly took over all navigational duties to guide us through some of the most picturesque and flat parts of the lakes. He also floated up  Kirkstone ahead of us despite being nearly 40 years our senior (20 on Ace...)

Best humorous names: Splatt, Cocks and Boghead. For whatever reason the south-west has definitely got the funniest place names of the regions we passed through! 

Best detour: Ian taking us across a Bull field to close a one mile (or 2 inch on the map) gap in the road missed during his route planning, Dicky's quick thinking to navigate around a road closure on the way to the Severn Crossing and Ace using the Caledonian canal as a welcome off-road section to get us to Loch Ness.

Best regional food: Pasties the size of a small baby in Cornwall, Haggis (lots of it) throughout Scotland and Devon scones and clotted cream at Week Farm.

Best/worst water crossing:  Padstow to rock ferry is how an estuary should be traversed, the fast lane of the  Runcorn to Wigan bridge is  not and the cycle lane over the Seven bridge was pretty spectacular. 

Best river/canal: River Wye in Gloucestershire, River Never in Southerland, Northern Scotland and the Caledonian Canal leading to Loch Ness. 

Best Loch/lake/reservoir: Ullswater lake, Loch Ness and Chew reservoir

Most challenging climb: Kirkstone Pass (and we didn't even take on the struggle), the double hill into Bristol at the end of a long day in the saddle and Cheddar Gorge. Notable mentions must also go to the unrequired climb up to Launceston castle post-lunch and the long pull up to Beauly when an extra 10 miles appeared late on in leg 12. 

Best additional cycling gear: Ace's 'bento box', Dicky's knee warmers and Ian's Scottish Gillet.

Best comment:  Dicky with his East Shieldhill is west of Shieldhill, Dicky mistaking the Lancaster canal for a stream (to the disgust of the locals), Ian prematurely celebrating 100 miles to go, and Ian stating as we neared our finishing point "it had better not be that dump".

Best Big Mike-isms : sustaining the worst injury of the tour when stubbing his toe in the night answering nature's call, being wrongly recognised in Hearthill as an old customer and his flashing headlights/horn beeping disgust at the proposed accommodation in Leadhills

Best/worst Animal: midges, Pinemartin and 'Sea Eagle' (we think) all spotted in Scotland. 

Final stats:

Total Mileage 1,118 miles

Unaccounted miles by sector
- Sector 1 (Ian): + 19 miles
- Sector 2 (Dicky): + 18 miles
- Sector 3 (Ace): + 18 miles
Summary: we are all about as bad as each other!

Feet climbed: somewhere between 30 and 45k or twice the height of Everest (and it felt it at times). 

Continuous days on the bike: 14 days

Time in the saddle: approx 85 hours

Peddle turns per cyclist: estimated at 500,000. Please see Ian for workings out (yes I know it could be way out!). 

Guest members in the peleton: 19 - many thanks to everyone who rode out with us and supported us at various points along the road. It really did lift our spirits and ultimately helped get us to JOG. 

Counties crossed: ~15

Borders crossed: 3, England to Wales, Wales to England, England to Scotland

Pubs visited: ~55
Pints drunk: ~70 pp
Drams sunk: ~15 pp

Beard/barnet update: Ian did have a 3 week head start but has turned into the ginger Father Christmas. Paul has developed a reasonable, if rather subtle, goatee-esk effort and Dicky's 'beard' remains rather shaggy and pathetic. On the barnet front we all bow at the knee of Andrew 'panzer helmet'  Dickinson for his impressive public schoolboy take on the Afro.

Falls leader board:
1st: Paul with four
2nd: Fergs with two (in one day guesting)
3rd: Dicky with one
4th: Ian with zero

Bike maintenance summary:
Ace had the first puncture at Preston docks 450+ miles into the tour. Dicky had a spectacular blow out after 550 miles due to the 'dodgy pump' saga and Ian 'Armadillo' Deane rode a puncture free tour. 

The only other 'major' incident was the consistent trouble Ace had with the common tourists nemesis, 'mudguard chaffing'. Fortunately he was talked out of the drastic removal action at the bottom of the Kirkstone Pass and managed to complete the tour with guards in tact. 

Special thanks must also go to Becs, Miriam and Amy, our very understanding and supportive wives who have put up with lots of cycling talk, purchase of new kit and obviously leaving us to go off on our boys tour for two weeks. I am sure we will all pay our dues next summer!  

So to the more serious side of our great adventure. We a pleased to report that we have already managed to raise a shed pile of cash for our respective charities. As we write this we estimate the total to be in excess of £4k with hopes that we each reach  our individual target of £2k. Thanks to everyone who has contributed and a shameless plug to say it isn't to late if you still want to pledge!

As we sign off the tour and roll back into London, talk has naturally turned to the 'next one'. The half ironman seems to have already been put in the diary for next June.  More ambitious talk has included the full Tour De France in 2012 and Side-to-side Australia at an unspecified date in the future. Perhaps LEJOG has merely wetted the appetite and it would be a shame to waste all the newly acquired Lycra. The main questions are whether our arses and marriages can take it!

We hope you have enjoyed our tour journal. 

TTFN

Ian, Paul and Dicky.